Complications of commuting

My partner works the other side of Birmingham and it’s a long drive each day in rush hour traffic through the centre of Birmingham. I work fifteen minutes down the road on a rout untroubled by rush hour. Yet my journey takes as long as his. Why? Because I’m the fool who takes the bus.

Now this is my own fault I’ve never got round to taking my driving test, or even many lessons. The lessons themselves are expensive. That and I’ll admit to terrible spatial awareness which means if a lorry comes along side me I freeze up. Not so good at junctions. So every day I take the bus into work, fifteen minutes down the road – simple.

Well no, unfortunately not so simple. This week I’ve been plagued by stupid bus drivers, annoying teenagers and a time table calculated so that if you work normal hours the bus is driving off just as you reach the bus stop.

Now I’ll be the first to admit that bus drivers have a hard job. For the most part I’ve found them to be pleasant, helpful and friendly. However on my bus route I unfortunately sometimes come across a woman who’s destined to give all bus drivers a bad name. She’s short but her attitude more than makes up for her lack in height! Today I don’t have the right change for the bus ticket. Is £19 and I only have a £20 note. Normally if that’s the case I pop into the newsagents for change. This morning I turn up early as always to see her driving full speed ahead at the bus stop. This is a woman who’s forgotten her brake actually exists. As there are several speed bumps on the way it means the only person I want to see at the end is my osteopath!

So as she’d early you’d think she’d wait at the bus stop and leave at the required time, but no not this woman. She goes so fast sometimes I look down expecting to be in my pyjamas again! Heaven help those who get the bus stops further down the route, unless they’ve just missed the bus before they have no chance of catching this one.

So I don’t risk going to the shop and just jump straight on the bus money in my outstretched hand.

“No change!” she glowers at me. “How do you expect me to have change at this time of the morning?” Hmm well should I mention it’s not normally a problem the other 51 weeks of the year, only the one week she catches me? No, there’s no point I think It would just go over her head (not difficult as she practically needs a booster seat!)

“Don’t worry about it” I say sunnily, well as sunnily as anyone can first thing in the morning, “you can give me the change at the end.” This is the normal procedure with the other drivers if they don’t have the right change. As it’s a busy rush hour route if they don’t have the exact change at the start they always do by the end.

“No I’m not doing that you’ll have to wait for the next bus.” She isn’t even looking at me at this point. Seems a strange response but maybe she’s worried that she wont get the change. I push the £20 note towards her.

“Well don’t worry about the change then.” The next bus gets me into work late, and it’s only £1 after all.

“No I’m not having you trying to get a free lift out of me.” Still grumpy, still not looking at me. Free lift, what is she on about? Last time I checked trying to hand over money wasn’t the usual procedure for a free anything. Perhaps if she actually looked at me…

“I’m not trying to get a free lift I’m trying to give you money.” I’m starting to get more than a little annoyed now and the other passengers are rolling their eyes at me. This is the woman all the other drivers refer to as “That One” with a shake of their heads. Obviously she annoys her colleagues as much as she annoys her passengers. Eventually she lets me on and even gives me change at the end of the journey. The whole time she refuses to look at me.

A perfect case of a little bit of power going to someone’s head. The only two things she can do all day to rebel is drive to fast and annoy all the customers. And oh boy does she put her all into doing both. Luckily I only see her about once a month, but every time she manages to upset at least one person on the bus. Hmm that’s customer service for you! I wonder if bus drivers get mystery shopped at all….